Loneliness gives everybody trouble sometime or other. It isn’t the same thing as just being by yourself. Loneliness is a feeling that can come you no matter how many people are around you.
Many of you have written me that you feel lonely at school because you don’t have as many friends as you’d like. You wonder if I don’t feel lonely, too, because I live by myself.
Well, my answer is that sometimes I do get lonely, but it isn’t because I live alone in an apartment. It’s because I get to thinking of my father and sisters and wondering what they’re doing. Sometimes I get to thinking of Manchester even when I’m on the set working and suddenly I get a sad feeling in the pit of my stomach. I feel like I’d like to run to the airport and get on a plane and fly right home.
Luckily, this feeling doesn’t last very long. I get over it quickly because there are lots of people around me and lots of things to do. The best time to get lonely is when there are people around you. If it hits you when you’re alone… this is when it’s really bad.
For those of you who worry about having friends, the best thing to do is to ‘be a friend’. I’m not one for giving advice so I won’t, but I think if you like someone and forgets about him liking you, eh probably will. It’s just natural to like someone who likes you. The next time you meet someone you’d like to have as your friend, try this. Just forget about yourself and think of the other person. Soon you’ll be surprised because you’ll have a new friend.
I can’t really think of any sure-fire methods of getting over being lonely. There are a couple of things I do when I feel this way. One thing is to get in my car and drive somewhere different… somewhere I’m not familiar with. Then when I get there I see new things and I begin to think about them. Soon I’m in a much better mood and I don’t feel very lonely at all. Another thing I do when I get to missing my family is to call them up. Nothing works better than hearing their voices. It’s a lot different than just writing a letter. When you talk to someone, you remember they really exist.
I’m glad I don’t get lonely too often and I hope you don’t either. Next to being hungry, I guess it’s the worst feeling in the whole world.
Love David Jones
On being me! This is what I’m going to talk about this month. Everybody has the idea that I’m pretty weird, but I don’t think I’m weird at all. I’m just myself. It all started a long time ago when I start saying the things I thought. Everybody looked at me as if I was some kind of nut. They still do.
When I think something, I say what I think. I know it isn’t considered the right thing to do, but I really believe that if everyone was honest about himself and his thoughts, the world would be a lot simpler place to live in. It really confuses me when people aren’t honest and don’t say what they mean. This doesn’t mean that you have to say thing to hurt people’s feelings. You can always keep quiet. But when you talk it should be something you mean.
When I was in England recently I noticed that the British are pretty outspoken. They sometimes surprised me by getting right to the point of things. I found that this was really true with John Lennon. Everything John says is pretty amazing and it’s always true. I think this must be one of the reasons why he’s such a great artist. He gets to the heart of everything in words and music.
My wife, Phyllis, was an English major and she’s also able to say what she means pretty easily. Maybe this is the reason why she can get along with me pretty so well. Most girls would probably have a difficult time interpreting me, but Phyllis is always there with a smile and an understanding way about her. If I do say so myself, she’s one of the most intelligent people I’ve ever met. She’s interested in everything and everybody and the person she’s least interested in is herself. This is why she’s so wonderful.
Thanks for writing me all those letters. I try to read every one of them and someday maybe I can answer them all.
The things I look for in a girl are many and varied, but basically she must be a nice person. I don’t expect a girl to be perfect. No one is perfect. But I do expect her to be kind, knowing, intelligent, and understanding.
As far as beauty goes I think the things that are the most important are skin and hair. I like a girl to have a beautiful clear skin and shiny hair. I don’t care what color her hair is as long as she keeps it sparkling clean. Also I like a girl to wear a good perfume. Not one that is real strong, but one that is just a good, clean, fresh smell.
Some of the things I don’t like about girls are these: I don’t like a girl who talks too much or who constantly worries about how her makeup and hair look on a date. I think a girl should get herself presentable before a date and then just forget about herself and concentrate on her date.
Surprisingly enough, some of the best dates I’ve had have been with girls who really don’t talk much. For instance they like to listen to good music or take long drives and just look at the scenery. This is just fine with me. It’s nice to be with someone and feel that they are close to you without having to talk every minute.
I want to thank all of you who have been sending me mail and presents. I wish that I could write you personally and thank you but since I can’t do this, my column will have to be my way of letting you know how I feel.
In closing I want to ask you all a very special favor. At concerts some people have started throwing things up to us on the stage. I know that everyone means well, but we’d really appreciate it if you’d tell everyone you see not to throw real hard objects at us. I really get panicked when I see these things flying at us. I ducked at our last concert and just missed getting hit in the eye. I know the girl who threw it didn’t mean to hurt me, but she nearly put my eye out. Please tell all of your friends not to throw things at the concerts.
Bye for now.
Magazine: Tiger Beat
Author: The Monkees
Editor: Ralph Benner
Publisher: New Asbury Ltd. Publishing Co.
Pages: 56, 58