“P.O. Box 9847”

Handsome, single, young man, well-respected in his town
Seeks a fine, young lady from a similar background
Generous, responsible, successful man of means
Socialize with presidents and queens

Reply
P.O. box nine-eight-four-seven
P.O. box nine-eight-four-seven

I’ve described me very poorly
Better try again

Quiet, sincere gentleman, well-rounded and mature
Fond of music and the arts, loves the theater
Educated, sensitive, a traveler of the world
Wants to meet an eligible young girl

Reply
P.O. box nine-eight-four-seven
P.O. box nine-eight-four-seven

[break]

I’ve been writing, advertising
That’s not really me

Lonely, understanding man, affectionate and true
Looking for girl to share his dreams and make them true
Humble, loving, sensitive, considerate and shy
Only sincere ladies need reply

Reply
P.O. box nine-eight-four-seven
P.O. box nine-eight-four-seven

I’m not liking what I’m typing
Throw it all away


  1. The Monkees: The Day-by-Day Story of the ’60s TV Pop Sensation (2005), Andrew Sandoval, p. 297.
  2. The Birds, the Bees & The Monkees (1994) (CD).