33 ⅓ Revolutions Per Monkee (1969)

Disembodied voice: Whooo are you?
Julie: Iiiiiiiiiiii aaaaam womaaaaan.
Brian: We have the knowledge, evil though it be, to twist the mind to any lunacy we wish, through this electro-thought machine. I’ll demonstrate exactly what I mean. We’ll take the means of mass communication, use them for commercial exploitation, create a new four-part phenomenon, four simple lads, of talent little or none, and through the latest fad of rock and roll, conduct experiments in mind control! On an unsuspecting public, they’ll be turned. I’ll brainwash them, and they’ll brainwash… THE WORLD!
Julie, Monkey, Brian: Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Brian: I conjure thee!
Julie: Iiiiiiiiii connnnnnjurrre theeeee!
Brian: Aaaaaaa—
Brian, Julie: —aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaappear!
Brian: Lower the tubes! Ah ha ha ha ha, ha ho, yes. Who are you?
Micky: I am Micky Dolenz!
Brian: Wrong, you are Monkee number one!
Micky: No, I’m—I am Monkee number one.
Brian: Who are you?
Peter: I am Peter Tork!
Brian: Wrong, you are Monkee number two!
Peter: No, I’m—I am Monkee number two.
Brian: Who are you?
Mike: I am Michael Nesmith!
Brian: Wrong, you are Monkee number three!
Mike: No, I’m—I am Monkee number three.
Brian: Who are you?
Davy: David Jones!
Brian: Wrong, you are Monkee number four!
Davy: No, I’m—I am Monkee number four.
Brian: Good, very good. Now let us see, let’s hear from you collectively!

All:
Hey hey, we’re The Monkees
And people say we monkey around
But we’re too busy singin’
To put anybody down

We’re just trying to be friendly
Come and watch us sing and play
We’re the young generation
And we’ve got something to say, oh

Brian: Yes, and now I’ve got something to say! You are all in my power!
Julie: Silly boys, brute force will get you nowhere. He’s not here now; your minds are free. Use them! Think yourselves out. Relax… relax… relax. Feel your bodies sinking and your spirits rising! Rising out of your heads, floating away into your own world of fantasy… floating away into your own world of fantasy… floating away into your own world of fantasy…

I thought love was only true in fairy tales
Meant for someone else but not for me
Love was out to get me (Do do-do, do-do)
That’s the way it seemed to me sometimes (Do do-do, do-do)
Disappointment haunted all my dreams

Then I saw her face (Then I saw her face)
Now I’m a believer (I’m a believer) (I’m a believer)
Not a trace (Not a trace) (Not a trace)
Of doubt in my mind (In his mind) (Of doubt in my mind)
I’m in love (He’s in love) (Ahh, ahh)
Now I’m a believer
I couldn’t leave her if I tried
If I tried

(I thought love was more or less a givin’ thing)
(Seems the more I gave, the less I got) Get a little less
(What’s the use in tryin’?) I kept on tryin’
(All you get is pain) I got-a pain in my eyes
(When I needed sunshine I got rain) Got-a rain, a-rain in my eyes

I saw her face (Then I saw her face)
Now I’m a believer (Believer) (I’m a believer)
Not not-a not-a not-a trace (Not a trace) (Not a trace)
(Of doubt in his mind) Of doubt in my mind (Of doubt in my mind)
(He’s in love) I’m in love (Ahh, ahh)
And I’m a believer
I couldn’t leave her if I tried
Try, try, get-a get-a gotta try, try to believe her, try to believe her, gotta, I gotta, try to believe her…

So go thy way
And soon I shall go likewise
And if thy path be high then be mine low
Behold my footprints in the sand but follow not
For soon they will be covered with snow

Thou makest me free
Then soon thou makest demands on me
And I am not thy love
Thou workest in the slavery

But I shan’t heed thee as before
I prithee, do not ask for love once more

Thou makest me free
Then soon thou makest demands on me
And I am not thy love
Thou workest in the slavery

But I shan’t heed thee as before
I prithee, do not ask for love once more

Now it’s quite a while ago that I had a strange intuition
Something was wrong with my gold record situation—

Why they say with so much adoration—

Well, I can’t see that that makes it right—

So for a while, I’ll just play my guitar, sing along!
And I’ll play a couple of tunes, yes, yes
And I know that it may not get me too far
But it’s the only thing I believe that’s true

Well, the devil incarnate runnin’ music supervision
Put me into a state of cataleptic euphemism—

Somebody’s preachin’ ’bout the wonder world of Communism—

Me and I don’t understand at all and—

So for a while, I’ll just play (Play) my guitar
And I’ll sing a couple of (These) tunes
And I know that it may not get me too far
But it’s the only thing I believe that’s true

Well, tell me Mr. T.V. Man
Just where you make your moral stand
Which way each day do you take your pay
Do you walk straight up?
Or do you face the other way?
Whoa, roogalator!

For a while, I’ll play my guitar
And I’ll sing a couple of tunes
And I know that it may not get me too far
But it’s the only thing I believe that’s true
Yes, it’s the only thing I believe that’s true

Smiling a painted smile, for a while
Raggedy Ann and I walk along
Under the painted sky, funny how time is flying

Alice In Wonderland
Would you mind if I just hold your hand for a while?
Maybe you’ll understand when I say

Hello Cinderella
I believe they’re playing our song
It certainly has been lovely
But I’ve got to be getting along

So Goldilocks for a while
Would you mind smiling your perfect smile?
You and I walking a painted road
Going where time won’t follow

Yes, Little Red Riding Hood
Isn’t it perfectly understood
When I say, “Living a storybook
Is better than waiting for tomorrow”?

Brian: Hmm. Interesting fantasies they have. Fixation, withdrawal, schizophenia, regression.

[break]

Brian: Hmm. Very well, send them back to the tubes. We shall continue the brainwash! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haaa! Ha ha, ha ha ha ha, ho ho ho ho!

I’m a wind up man
Programmed to be entertaining
Turn the key
I’m a fully automatic
Wind up man
Invented by the teeny bopper
Turn me on
And I will sing a song about a
Wind up man

I’m a wind up man
Programmed to be entertaining
Turn me on
And I will sing a song about a
Wind up world
Of people watching television
Wind up man
Can you hear me laughing at you?
Wind up man
Wind up man
Wind up man

Brian: Far too mechanical! Rhythmically wrong! I’ll teach you to sing another song! We start with a simple rhythm, as so! [rhythm] We then add a second! Yeah, go man, go! Then in with the third! It begins to gel. In with the fourth! {One mental head!} The total has a hypnotic effect! And the minds and the body will be utterly wrecked!
Darwin: Ah, balderdash, rubbish, and poppycock! Do you know who I am, or have you forgot? You’re trying to run before you can crawl! Now let’s get back to the start of it all!

All: In the beginning, there was Darwin.
Darwin: Yes, my card, number, and hallway is.
All: Then came the fish.
Darwin: But we like the chips, of course—hah hah!
All: Dinosaurs and brontosaurs followed.
Darwin: Yes, it’s in my book, Origin of Species.
All: And started an evolution!

?: Awake! Awake! Creation! Awake! And breathe!

?: Arise! Arise! Swim, crawl, and fly! The earth is yours!

Darwin: And the fittest shall survive! Muhwahahahahahahahahahahaaaa! Ah ha ha ha ha ha haaaa! Oh ho ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Darwin: And now, my masterpiece of evolution. And here they are, with the song of the hat of the book of the film of the tram… from the telephone directory of the same name.

I go ape every time I see you smile
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-choopa!)
I’m a ding-dong gorilla and I’ll carry you caveman-style
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-choopa!)
I’m gonna bop you on the head and love you all the while
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-choopa!)

Well, I’m a monkey’s uncle and a cousin to a chimpanzee—oh, about a Saturday night
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-choopa!)
I was a-reelin’ and a-rockin’ and a-swingin’ from a coconut tree
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-choopa!)
Oh, honey don’t you see, you bring out the monkey business in me?
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-hup a-hup a!)

[break]

Clive Thacker: I don’t believe it!

(Hup! Hooba!
Hup! Hooba!
Hup! Hooba!
Hup! Hooba!
Hup! Hooba!
Hup! Hooba! Hooba! Hooba!)

Monkey: Hiya, baby!

Ah, honey, don’t you know I’m gonna be true to you?
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-choopa!)
I’ll keep you in bananas and bring you coconuts too
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-choopa!)
And we’ll a-settle down in the nearest county zoo
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-choopa!)

Oh, ranga-tanga-ting-tong, I’m related to an old King Kong
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-choopa!)
Don’t you say you’re mine with the honky-tonky monkey shine
(A-hup a-choopa, a-hup a-hup a-choopa!)
When you hold my hand, I’m a pre-historic man
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, I go ape!

Darwin: Evolution can do no more! This is where science takes over. Four monkeys for selective service over to you, sir, right?

Brian: Certainly, but do you think you can make a man out of that one?
Julie: Well, I’ll see what I can do, darling.

Don’t you hear the music?
Don’t it feel good?
Let me get it to you
Try and let go

You don’t have to worry
About a thing
Just come on up
Come on up, now
Come on up baby, yeah, and have a good time, ohh

Love to watch it happen
When I dance with you
Love to watch the music take you
Right up to the mornin’

You don’t have to worry
About a thing
Just come on up
Come on up, now
Come on up, baby, yeah, and have a good time

[break]

Start it easy, take it slow
Let it take you where you wanna go
Come on with me
Don’t let me go alone
Keep on pushin’
Until we get home

Don’t it feel good?
Don’t it feel good?
Don’t it feel good?

Ah, ah-ah, ah-ah, ah
Ah, ah-ah, ah-ah, ah
Ah, ah-ah, ah-ah, ah
Ah, ah-ah, ah-ah, ah

Ahhh
Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah-ah
Ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah

Brian: I’ll brainwash them and they’ll brainwash… THE WORLD!
Julie, Brian: Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Clive Thacker: I don’t believe it!

Brian: The treatment is complete! The boys are set to become the biggest rock und roll stars yet! Their debut at the Paramount is fixed, December 7, 1956, and here they come! Idolize, plasticize, psychoanalyze, sterilize, The Monkees!

Ba, ba, ba, ba
Ba, ba, ba, ba
Ba, ba, ba, ba
Ba, ba, ba, ba
At the hop!

Well, you can rock it, you can roll it
You can slop and you stroll it
At the hop-hop-hop
When the band stops playin’
You calypso with the chicken
At the hop-hop-hop
Do the dance sensation that’s sweepin’ the nation
At the hop-hop-hop

(Hop baby hop) Let’s go to the hop
(Hop baby hop) Let’s go to the hop (Oh, baby)
(Hop baby hop) Let’s go to the hop (Oh, baby)
(Hop baby hop) Let’s go to the hop
Ho-ho-hop (Hop baby hop) go to the hop

I’m ready, I’m willin’, and I’m able, uh huh
To rock and roll all night
I’m ready, I’m willin’, and I’m able, uh huh
To rock and roll all night
Come on, pretty baby
We gonna rock, we gonna roll, until the broad daylight

Ah, shake, baby, shake it
Shake it, baby, shake, whoa
Shake me, baby, shake me
And then shake, baby, shake it
Come on over, whole lotta shakin’ goin’ on
Now let’s go!

Tutti Frutti, aw rutti
Tutti Frutti, woo!
Tutti Frutt, aw rutti
Tutti Frutt, aw rutti
Woo, aw rutti
Awop-bop-a-loo-bomp awop bam boo!

Talkin’ on the phone is not my speed
Don’t send me no letter ’cause I can’t read
Don’t be long ’cause I’ll be gone
We gonna rock and roll all night long

Because I’m ready, I’m willin’, and I’m able, uh huh
To rock and roll all night
I’m ready, I’m willin’, and I’m able, uh huh
To rock and roll all night
Come on, pretty baby
We gonna rock, we gonna roll, until the broad daylight

Ah, ah, ah, ah

Baby, shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it, baby
Here we go Lucy Lou, shake it up, baby
Here we go Lucy Li
Bend over, let me see you shake a tail feather
You bend over, let me see you shake a tail feather!
You bend over, let me see you do it!
Wow!

Ah, ah, ah, ah

Baby, shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it, baby (Bend over, let me)
Shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it, baby (Bend over, let me)
Shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it, baby (Bend over, let me)
Shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it, baby (Bend over, let me)

Micky: [whistles] Hey man, dig that craaazy chick!

Blue Monday, how I hate Blue Monday
Got to work like a slave all day
Here come Tuesday, oh, hard Tuesday
I’m so tired, got no time to play
But here come Wednesday, I’m beat to my socks
My gal calls, got to tell her that I’m out
’Cause Thursday is a hard workin’ day
And Friday, I’ll get my pay

Saturday mornin’, oh Saturday mornin’
All my tiredness has gone away
Got my money and my honey
And I’m out on the stand to play
But Sunday mornin’, I ain’t impressed
For it’s worth it for the time that I had
But I’ve got to get my rest
’Cause Monday’s a mess

Yaa, ya-ya-ya-yaa
Ya-ya-ya-yaa, ya-yaa

Davy:
Oh, little darlin’
Oh, little darlin’
Oh, where
Where are you?
My love-a, I was wrong-a
To try to love two
A-hoo-a, hoo-a, hoo-a, hoo-a

Well-a
That’s my lover
I was a-just
Just for you-a

Peter:
My darlin’
I need you
To call my own
And never do wrong
To hold in mine
Your little hand
I’ll know too soon
That all is so grand
Please, hold my hand

Well, long tall Sally, she’s built for speed
She got everything that Uncle John need, oh baby, woo! Baby, yeah
Baby, havin’ me some fun tonight, yeah

We gonna have some fun tonight
Gonna have some fun tonight
Gonna have some fun tonight
Everything’s alright
Gonna have some fun
Have me some fun tonight

Hey-ey-ey-ey (Hey-ey-ey-ey)
Hey-ey-ey-ey (Hey-ey-ey-ey)
Hey-ey-ey-ey (Hey-ey-ey-ey)
Hey-ey-ey-ey (Hey-ey-ey-ey)
Hey-ey-ey-ey (Hey-ey-ey-ey)
Hey-ey-ey-ey (Yeah!)

Well, you can’t be my lovin’ baby
Honey, you ain’t got the style
I’m a-gonna get some real gone love
Gonna drive a cool cat wild

I wanna move, move on down the line
Whoa, I gonna do right, baby, gonna do right all the time

Whoa, gonna move on down the line
I’m gonna get me a gal, I’m gonna make some time
She can’t be square, can’t be slow
And when she starts a-struttin’ you know she’s gotta go

I’m gonna move, move on down the line
Whoa, I’m gonna do right, do right all the time, yeah

Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Now hear the word of the Lord

Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Now hear the word of the Lord

You know the foot bone connected to the ankle bone
The ankle bone connected to the leg bone
The leg bone connected to the knee bone
Now hear the word of the Lord

You know the knee bone connected to the thigh bone
The thigh bone connected to the neck bone
The neck bone connected to the head bone
Now hear the word of the Lord

You know the thigh bone connected to the shoulder bone
The shoulder bone connected to the neck bone
The neck bone connected to the head bone
Now hear the word of the Lord

Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Now hear the word of the Lord

You know the head bone connected to the neck bone
The neck bone connected to the shoulder bone
The shoulder bone connected to the thigh bone
Now hear the word of the Lord

You know the thigh bone connected to the hip bone
The hip bone connected to the thigh bone
The thigh bone connected to the knee bone
Now hear the word of the Lord

You know the knee bone connected to the leg bone
The leg bone connected to the ankle bone
The ankle bone connected to the foot bone
Now hear the word of the Lord

You know the bones get together and they ’gin to talk
The bones get together and they ’gin to walk
The bones get together and they ’gin to shout
Now hear the word of the Lord

Hear the word of the Lord
Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Them bones, them bones, them dry bones
Now hear the word of the Lord

Brian: Wait a minute, Jack, hold on a minute, stop the show. Look, this brainwashing bit has gotten completely out of hand, you know, look, I’m Brian Auger and this is Julie Driscoll and we don’t want any more of this sort of brainwashing business. What we want is complete and total freedom—complete and total freedom! Now do you realize what that means?
Julie: Yeah, utter bloody shambles.

A string for my kite
Would really be nice
For then I could pull
A cloud from the sky
And, baby, then the sun would shine
And maybe I might even find a road
To where I’m goin’
If I’m goin’
Anywhere
Anywhere
Anywhere
Anywhere
Anywhere

[instrumental]

Peter: Hi Mike.
Mike: Hello?

Hey, hey, mercy woman
Plays a song and no one listens
I need help, I’m falling again

Play the drum a little bit louder
Tell me I can live without her
If I only listen to the band
Listen to the band

Weren’t they good?
They made me happy
I think I can make it alone

Oh, mercy woman
Plays a song and no one listens
I need help, I’m falling again

Play the drum a little bit louder
Tell me I can live without her
If I just listen to the band
Listen to the band

Weren’t they good?
They made me happy
I think I can make it alone

Oh, mercy woman
Plays a song and no one listens
I need help, I’m falling again

Oh, play the drum a little bit louder
Tell me I can live without her
If I only listen to the band
Listen to the band, baby!

Weren’t they good?
They made me happy
I think I can make it alone

Awake, man!
Awake, before it’s too late, man!
Oh, there comes a time
When love bangs at your door
And when that time comes
Running, running, and die!

Weren’t they good?
They made me happy
I think I can make it alone

Oh, mercy woman
Plays a song and no one listens
Please help me, I’m falling in love again

Play the drum a little bit louder
’Cause we can live without her
If only I’d have listened to the band
Oh, listen to the band

Weren’t they good?
They made me happy
I think I can make it alone

Clive Thacker: I don’t believe it!

“The end… the end… the end… the end… the end… the end…”

California, here it comes
Right back where it started from

“The end! The end!”

Oh yes, oh yes, this is the end, this is the living end, kids!

“The end!”

Oh, the joint is really going to rock tonight!

“It’s going to ROCK!”

Open up them Golden Gates
Californ—Californ—Californ—Californ—Californ—Californ—
Here it comes!