Hey, Hey, It’s The Monkees Quotes
Lawyer: A mansion, which some say is… haunted.
Micky: Uh, oh, I think we did that one already. Mike, when uh, did we do the, uh, staying in the haunted mansion for the inheritance episode?
Mike: Oh, gosh, it was years ago, like episode 186 or something.
Peter: We were wearing bell bottoms!
Micky: What’s the name of that other band, the one with the blood and the makeup, um…
Davy: Kiss?
Micky: No thanks. You know they have uh, high heels, and uh, the guy has a nine foot tongue? What is their name?
Mike: Uh, Kiss?
Micky: No, but Davy wants one.
Micky: Hey, hey, we’re the Monkees. People say we bleech!
Mike: I believe for every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows.
Micky: And every time the Monkees sing, they also blow!
Davy: Wow. That is not bad. What do you think, guys?
Mike: Yeah, but I like it when that happens. The house is on fire!
[laughter]
Mike: People are starving!
[laughter]
Mike: There is no fruit!
[laughter]
Davy: This is really messed up.
Micky: Just turn it all off.
Davy: Even the wild applause?
Peter: I’m starting to get thought balloons.
Davy: You have to entertain with a capital E!
Micky: Hey, kid. Wanna see me throw up?
Davy: I got it. Alright. The landlord, he comes to the door for the last rent payment, and then, and then all of a sudden, we’re on a desert island. On the other side, there’s some buried treasure—
Mike: Rent? We probably own the house by now.
Micky: You know, in today’s world of safe sex, it seems we’ve forgot about safe kissing.
Mike: And this is the third dimension, which is normal. Well, Monkees normal.
Guard: Yeah, right, and I’m Ethel Merman.
Davy: No, I’m Ethel Merman!
Peter: One oar in the water…
Davy: We have a new record out.
Peter: Are you really Martha Stewart?
Micky: Yeah!
Mike: Life is like a box of chocolates.
Davy: But she had stars in her eyes!
Micky: Yeah, and raisins and grapefruits and the international symbol for “slippery when wet”.
Micky: Ha ha! Hey, how you doing? What? Huh? What? Ha ha ha.
Mike: What a maroon. Heh heh heh heh heh.
Micky: I wonder if the general public knows that TV shows like ours never die, that they just go on and on even though they’re not being broadcast.