Genie’s Adventures in Groovyland

(Genie The Tailor opened shop recently in Hollywood and all the top stars shop there. She tells you about some of her customers in the story below.)

It was the day after the party and it took my two fairy godmothers (Ramona and Pat) and me approximately eleven thousand seven hundred and three quarter hours to clean up, approximately. The next day the sun shone brightly and we decided it was time to OPEN FOR BUSINESS (the shop, that is). So we did.

Furiously, we sewed buttons on, hemmed hems, snapped snaps, and generally, did all the things that tailors do when they have a shop that is OPEN FOR BUSINESS. (If you know what we mean.)

Just as we were in the middle of our work, who should walk in but Coco Dolenz with a beautiful smile on her face and clutching one of our embroidered dresses in her hand. “Why, Genie the Tailor,” she said, “I simply must have this dress!” And so we made our first sale. (Sigh.) She looked so beautiful in it that we were tempted not to charge her for it. But then I remembered the sage advice that Paul Revere had given me—“Just remember, Genie, don’t give credit!” Good old Uncle Paul.

Just as we were congratulating ourselves on our first sale who should walk in but Dino Danelli and Gene Cornish of the Rascals! Gene said the trousers were lovely and I thought Dino was lovely and Dino bought a lovely silk shirt and I was so happy! And if that wasn’t enough, that very afternoon (a Tuesday it was) Steven Stills and Neil Young of the Buffalo Springfield came in to wish me good luck. I was strong enough to bear it, but my fairy godmothers swooned in delight and it took a little while to revive them. I keep telling them that there is no place in the world for a swooning tailor, but they don’t listen, they just lie there swooning. Oh, well.

It turned out that Jefferson Airplane were in town for recording, so one night, I was very, very tired, and believe it or not (it’s pretty hard to believe) I had fallen ASLEEP in my rocking chair (and my mouth was open) and in walked Jorma and Paul and Spencer and they all started laughing at me asleep with my mouth open and my head back and of course I was so embarrassed I woke up and closed my mouth and was oh so mortified I could hardly speak. They said if I had been asleep with my mouth open one more minute they were going to put an apple in it. (Oh, mortification!)

Just as I was getting over the terrible embarrassment of that incident, Mark came over and brought me flowers. We had been working five days on a jeweled coat for his television show, and he said I needed a rest. He was very happy in his jeweled coat and velvet trousers, and I must say I was certainly proud.

Every once in a while David Crosby comes in to be nice and cheery, and his moustache seems to get more beautiful every day. F.G. Pat has a hard time recuperating from seeing David, because she just loves moustaches, and she says his is one of the finest.

Peter Tork came in one night after a day of filming their movie, and he was wearing my trousers! It was about the nicest thing to happen to me, having Peter come in in my trousers! He looked around and smiled and wished me luck, and I realized how much I love him because he always tries to encourage me and inspire me.

One night I was feeling really evil, and at the Troubadour (a folk club down the street) there was a press party for Richie Havens, the singer. Someone came in and told me that the Who had just gone in to listen. I went inside with a coat over my arm, metallic red, white and blue striped, really stunning looking, and I went over to Keith Moon, the Who’s clown drummer, and told him to try it on.

Once he had it on, he didn’t want to take it off. “How much is it?” he said. “Come on, what’s the price?” “Not for sale,” I announced, feeling very evil and mischievious. “I must have this jacket,” announced Keith, and what do you know, he did. I hope someday he pays me!

Mama Michelle came in today but I wasn’t there and don’t know what she thought of the store. Tonight everybody was here—David Crosby, Jack Nitzche, Jim and Jean, Dickie Davis, Kim Fowley, Penny Nichols, Chip Douglas, and thousands of others, and I’m pretty tired and I think we’re going to close and go home to bed, but I just want to say thank you for all the encouragment [sic], and I think it’s going to be a lot of fun, come what may.

Magazine: Tiger Beat
Editor: Ann Moses
Volume: 3
Issue: 10
Publisher: Laufer Publishing Company
Page: 56