“Mr. Webster”

Everyone in town knew Mr. Webster
He worked at the bank for forty years
And each week, Mr. Frisbee made his check out
For sixty-eight dollars clear
And through the years, he thwarted twenty-seven robberies
Each time, Frisbee promised him a raise

They gave a retirement party for Mr. Webster
Everyone from the bank was there
They had a cake and flowers ordered special
And Frisbee had a speech prepared
And a little white box that held a watch with this inscription
“To Mr. Webster, with regards”

Then came a telegram from Mr. Webster
Said, “Sorry, stop, cannot attend
I’ve flown away and taken all your money
Wish you were here to help me spend”
And one by one, all the people left the party
And Mr. Frisbee locked the door


  1. The Monkees: The Day-by-Day Story of the ’60s TV Pop Sensation (2005), Andrew Sandoval, p. 296.
  2. Headquarters (1995) (CD).